all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
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