I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize