How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
is it fun? or sober?
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
