i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
i came on her dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
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