I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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