Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Randomize
