i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I just want nice things and good sex
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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