you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Randomize
