D3 body, D1 cock
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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