I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Randomize
