this must be what syphilis tastes like
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Randomize