Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
