I'm drive I can fine osifer
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
