Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
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