I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
