there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Randomize