Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
the day after is always just damage control
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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