Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
