you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Randomize
