I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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