So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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