What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
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