Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
The cops high fived after they tackled you
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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