I'm really into asian looking animals
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
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