I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
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