Yo dont text me then not text me
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Randomize
