i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
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