Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
