dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
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