Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
The struggles of a small town man whore
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Randomize
