I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
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