pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
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