spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
25 Of The Most Common Life Mistakes Young People Make
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
25 People Confess What They Really Think When They See An Obese Person
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.