You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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