May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
I seem to have left my pride at pride
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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