So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Randomize
