What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
pray to the hookup gods
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Randomize
