What a fucking waste of an outfit
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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