Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
