he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize