My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
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I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
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Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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