for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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