I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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