he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
Randomize
