It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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