we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
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