he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Randomize
