...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Randomize
