nut hugger
We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
