Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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