Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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